I first came to Haidakhan in 1987 with a group led by Sondra Ray. Earlier in my life, I had a dream of a home nestled in the hills with two windows. In my dream this always felt like my real home.
When I approached Haidakhan for the first time I looked up from the river and saw the old kirtan hall which had two windows. I recognized it from my dream at once.
I was shocked that a middle-aged, middle-class English housewife could have been dreaming of a home in a remote mountain village of India. I was also taken by the beauty of the landscape and the flora of the area. The other thing I felt strongly was the love of the devotees and felt like I was being invited to make the Ashram my home.
I returned to England and then came back to India with my fourteen year old daughter for two months in 1989. When I returned back to England, my western life seemed to fall apart around me. My house and garden were majorly destroyed and my marriage had ended.
I traveled to India again in 1990 for four months. During this time Baba fulfilled all of my desires and I decided this is where I wanted to live.
I went back to England, divorced, sold my home and moved back to India in 1990 and have been here ever since. First, I managed the garden, then the karma yoga, and now the office and general management of the Westerners at the Ashram. Though my present role and duties are not easy, I find them fulfilling. I am grateful to Baba for continuing to let me live in Haidakhan.