Family Issues
T
he family is such an intergral part of life and the place where we learn our first lessons and how to interact with others. Shri Babaji encouraged householders to take care of their duties, to love and care for their children, and to keep up their spiritual practice. Babaji loves children and is often pictured with children in His lap. Shri Muniraji is a wonderful example of a loving family man with eight children and now many grandchildren and great grandchildren, who continually takes care of all his duties as well as his daily spiritual practices.
Life in these busy times often becomes challenging for families. We seem to be almost too busy to stop and enjoy the simple joys of living and being together as family. For this reason, we are including this section about families. The first entries are parenting questions and answers that have appeared in the local newpaper for the last year or so. We will also include other helpful ideas for families, so stay tuned.
If you have a question or a topic that you would like covered, just email us at info@Babajiashram.org.
We are here to serve. Bhole Baba Ki Jai!
Parent Talk by Ramloti - August 2008 |
My sister, Susie Walton, and I are writing a book on parenting entitled, Key to Personal Freedom, How Myths Effect our Family Lives. Here are some excerpts from a graduate of the Redirecting Children’s Behavior class.
Myth: Children aren’t Old Enough to Make Good Decisions.
New Idea: Give them Choices
We give our 21-month-old choices all the time so that he feels like he has some control over his daily life and activities. In the morning I have him choose between 2 different shirts to wear and he points right away to the one he wants to wear...and when I put it on him he looks down at it with pride. At night we do the same thing with his pajamas. Who knew a 21-month-old could be so decisive! When we go to the grocery store, I hold up two items and let him choose. When he brushes his teeth he chooses from two different kinds of toothpaste. Before I started doing that with him, he wouldn’t even brush his teeth. When we go down the driveway on his little scooter he chooses from two directions he can go. He knows not to go straight into the road but goes left or right because we have given him the right to choose.
MYTH: Household Chores are Drudgery.
New Idea: Have Fun!
My son Julien is not even two years old and I let him take glasses and plates out of the dishwasher, he loves putting them into the cabinet. It gives him a sense of purpose. He also loves taking clothes out of the washer and putting them into the dryer. He thinks it's a blast! Yes,
I could get these things done a lot faster without him but its much more fun to see the smile on his face when he helps me. I also put milk in a small cup and let him pour it onto his cereal. He loves that!
MYTH: Children Misbehave Because they are Spoiled or Bad.
New Idea: Children Misbehave Because their Needs are Not being Met.
Most of the time my 21-month-old son misbehaves because he is tired. When I push his nap time or bed time too late he lashes out and hits me or hits other kids. When he is done eating and wants to get out of his high chair he starts throwing food. When I follow his signals and pay close attention to his needs he does not act out. Like all children he wants us to hear his needs. When I am present with him he is a happy joyful kid. Before I get on the phone, I spend quality time playing with him, reading or doing puzzles, then I can get on the phone without him throwing a fit for my attention. If I walk in the door and haven’t seen him for a while and I get right on the phone, well then he acts out, naturally.
Last changed: Aug 30 2009 at 4:17 PM
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